As children, we are wired to need:
Love. Attention. Touch. Reassurance. Safety. Encouragement. Space to be messy.

When those needs are unmet — or inconsistently met — your system doesn’t just forget. It builds an internal blueprint that says:

“I must overdeliver to be loved.”
“I can’t slow down — it’s not safe.”
“Being seen = being judged.”
“If I need too much, I’ll be abandoned.”

Here’s the key:
Unless that pattern is met with presence and reparented, it will keep running in the background of your life — no matter how much you know better.

We project these unmet needs onto the world:

  • We expect our partner to validate us endlessly

  • We overwork to gain the approval we never got

  • We avoid creative risks because past vulnerability felt dangerous

This isn’t a mindset issue — it’s an energetic pattern. And your nervous system is trying to resolve it through repetition until you finally turn inward and give yourself what you never received.